Top Fives

For a while now I've been making mental Top Five lists, an idea I got from the movie High Fidelity. I'd like to say I got it from the book, because I think it would make me sound, if not smarter, at least hipper, but I've never read the book. Still, referencing the movie's got to score me some hip points. Doesn't it?

Top Fives are fun because 1) everybody enjoys making lists, and B) they're not nearly as much work as Top Tens--you can cobble together five relevant entries on just about any subject without taxing your brain. Plus, if you're not a huge fan of strict hierarchical rankings, which I'm not, Top Fives seem nicer, because really, five is not all that far from one--not nearly as far as ten, which is...um, you know...twice as far.

Picture it this way: you can easily fit 5 people into a hot tub, but 10 would be a stretch. Try to squeeze 10 people into a hot tub, and inevitably someone's going to end up sitting uncomfortably close to a hirsute fellow in a Speedo, or having a jet of bubbles directed at high speed into their special area, or just standing pathetically by the spinach dip, insisting that they're grossed out by hot tubs anyway. I like to think of Top Five lists as five friends just chillin' in the hot tub, drinkin' some wine and shootin' the breeze. Leavin' the "g"s off their participles. I guess the person who owns the hot tub would be number one on the list.

So, since the primary reason for this blog is getting some of the clutter out of my head and into tangible--or at least visible--form, Top Fives old and new will doubtless be a semi-regular feature. By way of example, here's one that's been kicking around for a while:

Top 5 Funkiest Songs Ever Played on Top 40 Radio

5) "Flash Light", Parliament
4) "Thank You (Falettinme Be Mice Elf Agin)", Sly & the Family Stone
3) "Cisco Kid", War
2) "Brick House", The Commodores
1) "Tell Me Something Good", Chaka Khan & Rufus

Now this is a particularly hot tubby example, because, well, these songs are all damn funky, and trying to discern subtle gradations of funk is ultimately pointless, if not impossible. This just happened to be the order I settled on. Also, you may be saying, funkiest songs? Where's [James Brown, Stevie Wonder, your own personal fave funkmeister]? Again, the beauty of the Top Five is that it's not meant to be exhaustive. However, depending on the subject the rankings may be more meaningful, and I may include notes on the entries, if I feel so moved.

If anyone actually reads this, I encourage you to make your own Top Five lists. You can use my subjects, or make your own. Try it, it's fun!